Last year, I didn’t think I had anything to forgive myself for in my life, and if I did, it wouldn’t have occurred to me that self-forgiveness would have unlocked the next level of well-being, success and happiness for me. Yet, that’s precisely what happened through my work with Steve Hardison.
I didn’t know what to expect when I hired Steve for a 10-hour coaching agreement. But his reputation preceded him, and I had an excellent “Be-With” coaching session with him in December 2021, which led to considerable shifts in me personally and professionally.
I was equal parts nervous and excited.
During our sessions, we dove into how I listen and speak to myself. We started to uncover some of the judgments I held against myself that I hadn’t consciously paid attention to. My homework from that first session was to write all of these judgments down and not tell anyone I was doing the exercise.
When I flew to Phoenix six weeks later, it felt like I was holding a weighty burden. I had it all on a piece of paper, which I printed off as requested by Steve. I was holding a page and a half of judgments against myself that I’d never seen written down, and I felt terrible when I looked at them.
Steve asked me to reread them at the start of our second session. I struggled to get through them without crying. It was like looking at the worst opinion I had of myself. And it seemed to be true.
What helped me was learning to forgive myself for these judgments. I hadn’t realised what a profound experience it would be to genuinely forgive those judgments and allow a deeper sense of love to flow back into my life. Over a year after that self-forgiveness session, I am kinder to myself. I am more considerate of others and even go so far as to say I finally love myself.
That gift of self-forgiveness was worth the entire coaching agreement I had with Steve, and it has led to tidal waves of positive ripples in my business, my life, my family, and my relationship with myself. This has gone beyond being a technique to a way of being that is more conducive to the life I want to live.
You might take a few moments to sit down and quietly think about the judgments you’re holding against yourself and what it might look like if you were to forgive yourself for them.
You might be surprised what could be possible.
P.S. There is a great podcast session by Alex Manzi where he discusses how to forgive yourself and live a life free from the past and the judgment of yourself. He recorded this podcast after listening to an audio by Sydney Banks on forgiveness that I played during one of my Powerful Men’s Immersions which Alex attended. Please check out his video down below:
With love and appreciation,
Ankush Jain
Coach and Author of Sweet Sharing – Rediscovering the REAL You
