Build Rapport Before You Challenge People

Here’s something I’ve come to understand deeply: rapport isn’t just a nice-to-have in coaching conversations. It’s the foundation that allows you to have the most impactful conversations.

Think of rapport as the currency you earn before you spend. The stronger your connection with someone, the more you can challenge them and invite them to see beyond their current thinking. Without a deep feeling of rapport, even the most brilliant coaching question can fall flat.

So many coaches rush to be helpful. They spot the gap, see what’s possible, and immediately want to point it out. But what I’ve learnt is that people need to feel genuinely seen and heard before they can truly hear you.

This doesn’t mean being soft or tiptoeing around difficult conversations. It means being present. It means slowing down. It means listening so deeply that, when you do speak, your words land because the other person trusts you’re coming from a place of genuine care.

When you take the time to establish real rapport, something shifts. You’re not just delivering feedback or asking insightful questions; you’re creating a space where transformation becomes possible. Your clients feel safe enough to be challenged, vulnerable enough to look at their blind spots, and open enough to change.

The coaches who master this don’t just have clients, they have raving fans who refer others and often renew their agreements without hesitation.

I am adding below a full clip from a live AJC weekend where I go deeper into how rapport creates the conditions for powerful coaching. This is the kind of topic we explore together in the coaching school. Not just theory, but practical skills that transform how you show up with clients and the results you create together.

P.S Even though the doors for AJC 2026 are not open yet, if you are interested in joining, send me an email and we will create a way for you to make that happen

 

With love and appreciation,
Ankush Jain
Coach and Author of Sweet Sharing – Rediscovering the REAL You

Why perfection gets in the way of real coaching

At the AJC Coaching Career School the live masterclasses have become one of my favourite parts of the program. Every few weeks I invite a coach I deeply respect to come, share valuable lessons from their business and coach live. These are people who don’t just talk about coaching, they live it. And every time our community walks away with something that changes how they see themselves and their work.

In the first masterclass of 2025 I invited back Amir Karkouti. Amir has been teaching in our school since 2022 and I keep bringing him back because he has a way of pointing us back to what really matters. He reminds us of our humanity.

In this session Amir talked about his early days as a coach when he believed he had to show up perfectly for his clients, using the right words, looking polished, always trying to give the impression that he had the answers. What he discovered over time was that the breakthroughs never came from that performance. They came when he dropped the act, admitted he did not know and stayed with his clients anyway.

Listening to Amir brought me back to something Steve Chandler once told me:

“Bring the thing you are most afraid to share into the session.”

It is a lesson I have carried for years and hearing Amir’s story was a fresh reminder of it.

And it is not just true for coaching, it is true for life. We often hold back waiting until we feel ready but the real transformation comes when we show up now just as we are.

So let me leave you with this: what might shift for you if you stopped waiting and gave yourself permission to step forward exactly as you are today?

If you want to feel what it’s like to be inside one of our masterclasses, watch this short clip from Amir’s session. It’s one of those moments you can’t quite explain, you just have to experience it.

With love and appreciation,
Ankush Jain
Coach and Author of Sweet Sharing – Rediscovering the REAL You

How Can I Get More Corporate Referrals?

When I was in my corporate job, I knew a few coaches. Some were good. But I only ever referred one to my company, Jamie Smart.

Not because the others weren’t good. But because I knew the impact Jamie had on my work performance.

I wouldn’t just refer any coach. I cared about my reputation in the company and I didn’t want to vouch for someone who would make me look bad.

That’s the thing with referrals inside organisations. They’re not casual. There’s always something at stake. Reputation, status, trust…

So if you’re a coach who wants more corporate referrals, this might help: instead of chasing introductions, start planting seeds.

When I was looking for corporate clients, I didn’t wait for people to say yes. I just served.

I’d send leaders books, handwritten messages and audio and video clips that had moved me. I wasn’t trying to sell. I was focused on giving.

At the last AJC Coaching Career School, I shared this idea with a room of 45 coaches. One of them was Julie Brown.

Julie really listened. Not just with her ears, but with her heart. And then she took action.

She thought of the hotel we host the school in, The Rubens at the Palace. She reached out to the manager. Sent them a book. Started a conversation. And offered to do a workshop for the staff to improve performance and give them an experience of her work.

They said yes.

They were deeply impacted by what she shared and genuinely curious to learn more about coaching.

What do you think were the chances of them working with her after that? Much higher.

Not because she followed a strategy. But because of where she came from: service.

This is farming, not hunting. I plant seeds every day. Some sprout months later. Some, years. But the soil gets richer the more I serve.

So if you’re looking to create more corporate clients, start with this question:

Who do I know who works in an organisation? How can I serve them this week?

That’s where your next client is waiting.

We will host our last AJC Open Webinar on Thursday at 19h30 UK. This is an opportunity for you to get an experience of the school and grow your business right away. Last time we had 100 coaches attending and I am committed to making these better each time. We will be covering how to serve people powerfully without being salesy.

Sign up here – https://tally.so/r/wdy0eN

With love and appreciation,
Ankush Jain
Coach and Author of Sweet Sharing – Rediscovering the REAL You

How to Turn Your Income Tap On

There was a time I didn’t believe I could choose how much money I made.

I thought it was something that happened to me. A function of how the market moved, how clients responded, and how visible I was.

I heard Steve Chandler say, “You get to turn the income tap on and off.” And for a long while, it sounded like fantasy. Who gets to choose that?

But slowly, the more I coached and got coached by him, I began to see what he meant.

Not in a brash, “just go get it” kind of way. But in the simplicity of being in service, building relationships, and the natural rhythm of a coaching business:

More Useful Conversations = Higher Potential for Creating Clients.

I’ve seen this work long enough to now know that the tap metaphor doesn’t just sound nice. It’s really true.

Recently, I remembered this again while sharing a resource with someone. I told them: if you promise to listen with your full attention, I’ll send it to you. Not because I’m withholding, but because I value their time — and mine.

Of the people I sent it to, maybe half listened. Of those, a few reached out. From there, conversations began. And from those conversations, new clients.

It’s not magic. But I know it can feel like it from the outside.

That’s why I am running an AJC webinar tomorrow open to all coaches who want to get better at enrolment and serving people powerfully. This will be really useful whether you are a seasoned coach with years of experience or if you are at the start of your journey.

We will meet tomorrow at 19h30 for 90 minutes, and I will be coaching you live on taking your enrolment to the next level in a way that feels authentic and ethical. It will also give you a great experience of what happens in the AJC Coaching Career School if you are interested in grabbing one of the spots left for this year’s cohort.

Here is the webinar link: Add Webinar to Your Calendar

With love and appreciation,
Ankush Jain
Coach and Author of Sweet Sharing – Rediscovering the REAL You

P.S. This blog was inspired by a moment in the last AJC school when we were taking a deeper look at enrolment. This is worth your time

What Happens When We Stop Chasing Clients – with Melissa Ford

There’s a moment from my conversation with Amir that I’m thinking about.

On the surface, Amir was talking about coaching, but really, he was talking about who we are being everywhere in our lives.

He said the biggest shift didn’t come from the strategies he taught at the recovery centre where he once worked. It came when he shared, truthfully, about a moment when he’d fought with his wife. Or when he hadn’t spent enough time with his daughter. When he let himself be fully human in front of them.

That’s the reason I love Amir’s masterclasses. When he spoke about these raw moments, I felt that.

Because I can completely relate. I’ve been on my journey of personal and professional growth for 25 years now. And, surprise, surprise, I am not perfect!

People often come to me and ask: How do I get paid consistently for coaching?

But the real gold is when we discover that the change isn’t just in one area. It’s about who we need to be in all areas of our lives.

That’s when the deeper and more sustainable shifts begin. That’s when people start enrolling clients, not because they’ve found the perfect thing to say, but because they’ve stopped hiding who they are. That’s when their interaction changes. Their relationships change. Their lives change. And they make more money.

I’ve invited Amir back again this year, not just because his masterclasses are brilliant (they are). But because he walks his talk. The way he treats his wife. The way he plays with his daughter. The way he shows up in our school community, even when he has ten other things going on. He’s not coaching full-time (he runs other businesses). However, he’s living this full-time.

That’s what this school is about. Not about looking good or presenting yourself as an expert. It’s about being real and creating authentic relationships with your clients.

We don’t need to fake it until we make it. We just need to come in, as we are. And stay on the path to being what we teach.

Thank you, Amir. For your heart, your honesty, and your humour.

If you’re a coach and something resonates with you as you read this, I invite you to pay attention to it.

If you let it, it might just change your relationship with coaching forever.

With love and appreciation,
Ankush Jain
Coach and Author of Sweet Sharing – Rediscovering the REAL You

What Happens When We Stop Chasing Clients – with Melissa Ford

Every time I have a conversation with Melissa Ford, I’m reminded of why I appreciate her so much. We recently recorded a short video to give a glimpse into her masterclass for the AJC Coaching Career School this year.

One thing Melissa shared struck a chord: the way insecurity creeps in when the focus shifts back to me. When I’m in service, I’m plugged into something bigger than myself. I’m no longer thinking, “What do I need to feel okay?” but “How can I support and serve someone else?”

Melissa spoke of hitting financial goals only to realise they were just milestones, not the destination. She discovered it’s the joy of watching others grow that feeds her soul, and I can relate.

We also spoke of compersion—that wholehearted joy for the success of others. When a coach who’s worked with me chooses to work with Melissa, I celebrate that. I know they’ll be well served, and that is the most important thing.

I’ve noticed that the more I let go of the need to hold on, the more freedom I feel. And strangely enough, opportunities seem to flow more easily. Money, yes. But also meaning and connection.

Melissa reminded me that when insecurity hits, it’s an invitation to pause and ask: “What am I believing that’s making me feel this way?” That’s the real work. Returning to presence. Over and over.

Here’s what I know after years of coaching: when I’m in service, I’m free from personal thinking. When I’m caught in neediness or comparison, I’m stuck. The choice is always mine.

If you’re reading this and feeling a little sticky yourself, here’s one thing you can play with this week in your practice:

Throughout the day, notice when you start to feel attached to a client working with you, when you’re subtly hoping they’ll sign up or stay on.

You might feel:

  • A tight feeling in your chest or stomach
  • A thought like “I hope they don’t leave”
  • Anxious or preoccupied after a conversation
  • Difficult to make a proposal, or boldly speak what needs to be said, afraid they might not agree.

When that happens, pause and ask yourself:

“If my only job was to help this person succeed in whatever they’re up to, what would I do to help them?”

Notice how that shifts your energy. See what opens up in the conversation.

Watch how your own sense of presence and freedom grows.

Here’s the recording of my conversation with her. Please watch it twice. There’s gold in there.

With love and appreciation,
Ankush Jain
Coach and Author of Sweet Sharing – Rediscovering the REAL You